Vladimir Putin Claims He Doesn’t Have Bad Days Because He’s Not A Woman

In today’s “you shouldn’t say that” presidential edition, Vladimir Putin lies to the world with a claim that he doesn’t have bad days because he’s not a woman. Which may be the most Russian statement ever. A country known for being overtly sexist, anti-gay, and apparently not a place for people who have bad days.

I’ve had plenty of bad days and now I’m really questioning what I’m doing wrong cause I too am not a woman. Is there serotonin in Russia’s water? Does Putin never question his actions while curled up in bed scrolling social media? Or is the President blatantly lying to the world just their M-O? 

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In an all new docu-series created by Oscar-winning filmmaker Oliver Stone, Putin provides intimate insight into his personal and professional lives, from his childhood under communism, to his rise to power, his relations with four U.S. Presidents, and his surprising takes on U.S.-Russian relations today.

The 4-part series will air next week on Showtime. 

Unlike Megyn Kelly’s underwhelming interview with Putin last weekend for her new NBC show, in which Putin deflected her questions like a soft toss in wiffle ball, Stone was granted unprecedented access to Putin over the past two years, for what should be the most detailed portrait of Putin ever from a Western interviewer. 

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The Russian President’s comments came in series of interviews with Stone on topics ranging from geopolitics to gay rights and Edward Snowden.

When Stone asked Putin during a tour of the Kremlin if he ever had bad days, Putin said being a man meant he did not have to worry about this. “I am not a woman, so I don’t have bad days. I am not trying to insult anyone. That’s just the nature of things. There are certain natural cycles,” Putin told the director, according to Bloomberg News, which has seen an advance version of the documentary.

So according to Putin, the only reason human beings have bad days is when they’re on there period. What a tight fucking ship this guy runs, no bad days? Ever? No wonder why everyone obeys him, he’s a man who has never had a bad day. Everybody just wants to live a life like Putin, even this pigeon.

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