I’m Already Terrified of the New ‘It’ Movie, But I’m Totally Going to Watch

Growing up, each Wednesday afternoon in the summer was spent at the movies with my dad and brother. Even though my feet could barely touch the ground in those deteriorated foam seats, I was in charge of what movie we got to see. Sweet, right?

Yup! 12 weeks of Pixar and Disney sequels and there was nothing they could do about it. For me, life was great and I just figured it would remain that way forever. But that’s not how life works, because soon enough, my movie enlightenment period ended and it became time to join the PG-13 club. AKA, the Disney days were over. I was tossed into the cinematic world of blood, murder and action-packed thrillers.

R-rated films were also thrown into the schedule, which regularly gave me nightmares and the daily fear of opening my closet door after sundown soon followed. But hey, after years of closing my eyes and munching on snacks at the climax of the plot, I got used to seeing these movies that keep me up at night.

But then, this came out, and I instantly regressed back into that child who wished the 36th Shrek movie would hit the box office this weekend. Yeah, I’m talking about Stephen King’s IT.

Just take a look for yourself:

If you’re like me and had to build the courage to watch the trailer, you’d be shocked to find out that this is one of the most anticipated movies of all time. Somebody at the top knew that throwing in Finn Wolfhard from Netflix’s Stranger Things would attract the sissy group, myself included, to go see the film in person. It worked.

*On a side note, what really hooked my attention was the new meme at 2:16. Please do me a favor and just check out the Youtube comments, they’re hilarious. It brought a huge sense of comic relief as I was wiping the tears of fear away from my eyes.*

Anyway, I’ve been dreading this day since Warner Bros announced their plans to go through with this project. The 90’s mini-series with Tim Curry was way more my speed. I mean just look how much friendlier he was than this new clown…literally.

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Scary? Yes. At least the original actually looked like a clown, ya know?

If you think seeing this movie is scary enough, no need to paddle on your own because I’m in the same boat as you. But for those of you thrill seekers who are looking to raise the stakes, there is another outlet to watch this film, if watching a murderous clown rampage through a small town in rural Maine, isn’t enough.

On IT’s September 8th release date, the Alamo Drafthouse in Austin, Texas is opening its doors to the public, with a special caveat for those who want dive headfirst into the horror genre. The venue is hosting a clown-only screening of IT. Yes, clowns. As in, from head to toe, or more properly, from red buttoned nose to yellow and blue polka dotted size 10 shoes, all attendees will be draped in clown inspired costumes. I’m no Raven Symone but this has trouble from the word ‘Go’.

Encouraging those in the audience to dress as close Pennywise the Clown, the antagonist of the movie who murders children in the sewers, is equivalent to keeping the stove on in front of a child or eating a hot dog after bypass surgery. You’re asking for trouble.

You’ve just got to have a bit of empathy for all those clowns who will be getting a bad rep after this movie comes out. Creating a negative stereotype around clowns will just screw up what little entertainment value they have left. It wasn’t long ago where upstate New York had their own problems with clown sightings that brought uneasiness to towns all over the map.

One professional clown came out against the movie last week, arguing that the movie is bad for business since parents and teachers may be,”scared to hire [clowns for a party] in case they’ve got one child who will be upset.” He’s right. Let’s just say after the movie debuts in a few days, the clown industry will be having a pretty tough time marketing their services to little Timmy’s 3-year old birthday party.

Either way, whether clowns are in the seats, or clowns roaming streets, I know my butt will be in a movie theatre on Wednesday next to my dad and brother. Hopefully, Mike from Stranger Things makes it out safe and sound so I can find some peace that night when my head hits the pillow.



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