The Official Results Of Our First Annual Ugly Christmas Sweater Contest

Two Buttons Deep dabbles from time to time with IRL events. This weekend we held the first annual ugly Christmas sweater party at the Troy Kitchen, along with our friends at a small brewing company known as Miller Lite.

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People packed the house with their take on ugly. Some sweaters were ugly, and some ugly people just showed up dressed as themselves. Regardless, the spirit was real, the Miller Lite was flowing all night, and everybody went just the right amount of buttons deep at the Troy Kitchen. Which is arguably one of the coolest venues in Troy, if not the entire Capital Region.

2BD’s own Jackson Carp and Don Marko took to the stage to MC the contest. Who was the ugliest? Let’s get to meet the contestants. 

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We’ve got “Make Christmas Great Again” girl. A political statement? Not really sure. She also had Trump faces all around her back so I’m not sure if she was supporting or making a mockery. But regardless, our President is bringing Christmas back, because apparently it left?

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Now we’ve got these two guys. Not pictured is middle dude’s sweater which was incredibly lit up…but he was drinking Heineken at a Miller Lite event so by default he was disqualified. Also, guy on the right, is that the front end or the rear end of a reindeer? “Whatever you want it to be” he replied.

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Now we have a crowd favorite…”What’s inside that belly?” Marko asked. “Cocaine” the he replied…He was in high demand after the contest wrapped up.

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Here we’ve got a man proudly volunteered by his wife to participate. Why? He was wearing a women’s medium sweater slyly hidden beneath his sports coat. He went all buttons deep for the show though, and that’s all we can ask.

COMING IN 2ND PLACE WAS…

We had a controversial 2nd place pick. Let me be clear, this was not 2BD’s decision. It was crowd voting, whoever had the best reaction won. No bias, just science. And here’s who pulled in 2nd place:

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Full-fledged Rudolph the red nosed reindeer. We were honored he made an appearance at our event. But were the people happy? Absolutely not. “It’s not a sweater!!!” the crowd roared. “I’m sweating, so it’s a sweater” Rudolph snapped back. 

And coming in 1st place was…

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With a belly full of hops and a (not-viewable) beer pouring into a cup (aka her hair), she won the crowd’s heart and minds and somehow picked up the nickname “dumpster diver” along the way. Must have been a miscommunication because we all have no idea where it came from. But she won and she was spectacular.

The night was a total success. We have nothing but love for everybody who showed up and went buttons deep. The Troy Kitchen puts on some killer events in Troy, NY and hosts a food court of 6 of the best startup restaurants you can eat from, all for under $10 every day. Definitely worth checking out, with or without an ugly sweater.



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Author: Jack

Founder of Two Buttons Deep. Once went four buttons deep but that was a bad decision. Avid Hawaiian shirt enthusiast. Troy, NY.

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