An American University fraternity house located off the school’s campus in the nation’s capital was filled with so much booze at a party that the air tested positive for alcohol, police said. That is definition going all buttons deep.
First of all, is that even a thing? Can the air really get drunk? If so, why is this the first time I’m hearing about this? I’m getting some crazy ideas that you could get a party drunk without even taking a drink. But then again, that doesn’t sound fun at all.
So my question is, does the air get drunk at every packed college banger? Or was this party some Project X shit? Or were the police just flexing their power by testing the air after booting 70+ minors from a party? I’m going with the latter.
The students, all part of Sigma Alpha Epsilon, allegedly refused to tell police how they acquired the large amount of alcohol. The fraternity members each also face “up to $315,000 in fines pertaining to their stack of criminal charges.”
315K!!! I pray to god these are trust fund babies who get to laugh off a $315K fine the way I can laugh off a $315 ticket in exchange for the fact it’s a story I’d tell the rest of my life. But if they’re not, even if all 70 ponied up to pay the bill that’s still $4,500 EACH. No chance college students are gonna scrap that up. And no chance these kids are ever coming back
“Officers found eight people huddled together in a bathroom and one partygoer who jumped out of a second-floor window to avoid police.”
You must REALLY not want to get in trouble to jump out of a second story window. That’s a risk ranging from being paralyzed to a scraped knee. I think I’d rather just take a ticket.
“Police performed breathalyzer tests on partygoers who were between 17 and 20 years old.”
That explains it, they’ll learn it ain’t so bad.
Two Buttons Deep is a news & entertainment website based in upstate New York.
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