So last night I made my way down to Troy to visit the 2BD squad at their meeting for the first time ever. And I’d like to say, I was pleasantly surprised. 2BD HQ is legit and their go-to after work bar The Bradley has some of the nicest people working there ever. We had a meeting to discuss what we were going to be doing in the coming months and while we were talking, the topic of chew vs. cigs was brought up.
Now that I am off the spit tobacco (four days clean) I wanted to ask the people of the world what is more unattractive. Here is how I see this shaking out.
The number one argument I’d think there would be regarding darts is the smell. Unlike the wacky tobaccy, cigarettes smell terrible and it’s the first thing people notice when you walk in a room, especially during the winter. Why the winter? Because it is cold as fuck outside and there are mutants on this planet that smoke cigs in their car with the windows up just to avoid the cold. I see it all the time.
On top of that, if there is any sort of precipitation, you make the conscious decision to end up smelling like a wet dog who rolled around in some 50 year old asbestos just to catch your buzz. The days of Joe Camel being the coolest cat on the block are long gone.
In Joe Camels defense, that’s a cool dude.
Obviously not the best look either. You put tobacco in your mouth, your mouth rots, and girls don’t want their mouth anywhere near that. In the past when I dated girls there was always a battle of quitting / not quitting. Something some of my best friends and lads all around go through to this day. Again, I used to do this (four days sober, SUP LADIES?!) because of the hockey type of culture and I guess I just never realized how normal non-hockey people thought of this. Not only is the dipping part not what you’d call sexy, but leaving spitters all over the place is something you’d rather not have around you. Lastly, there is no Joe Camel when it comes to chew. The coolest image I can find is a picture of the guy from Duck Dynasty who made a spitter out of a Bud Heavy can, pretty cool.
After seeing this picture I am thinking quitting the game is just a bad decision.
In my opinion, cigs are worst and here is why. After you pack a lip, you can immediately throw away the spitter, brush your teeth and toss in a piece bazooka bubblegum and no-one would have any idea. The only thing you can do with a cig is spray yourself with Axe and then you wind up smelling like the kids who would go to smokers corner in high school (you know exactly who I am talking about.) Cigarettes and leather gloves, the glory days.